I held his paw and slept by his side for 14 days in hospital. But it turned out, all the love in the world wasn’t enough to save him. Thus begins the final post on Life of Dozer.
My dearest Dozer,
You came into my life in my arms, holding you protectively. And after almost 14 years together, I held you in my arms protectively again as I said goodbye.
I was sobbing so hard, I forgot everything I wanted to say to you in our final moments together.
So I started writing this letter to you, to say all those things.
I wanted to reminisce about our wonderful times – the thousands of visits to the dog beach, all the wonderful food we sampled together, the cuddles, the neck-scratching-sessions, our road trips.
I wanted to thank you for spreading the joy that is you with readers all around the world, for happily coming along with me to meet readers at events, book signings, fund raisers, lunches, dinners, not to mention TV shows, photo shoots, and my gosh, we can’t forget our stint on Play School!
But as I sit here, typing away with tears streaming down my face, I realise that’s not what I want to say to you.
What I want to say is thank you.
Thank you for giving me your whole heart.
Thank you for giving me your unconditional loyalty.
Thank you for loving me just as I am, for all my flaws, for never caring what I weigh, what I wear, what I look like.
Thank you for always being there, my one constant through the good and bad times.
Thank you for making me smile, even on the hardest of days.
And thank you for trying so hard to stay with me as long as you could, fighting to heal until your very last day. I will never forget how deep you had to dig to find the strength for your rehab walk on our final morning together.
I know that one day, I will be able to look at photos of you again without sobbing. And I know all this pain I am feeling is because I loved you so fiercely and completely, and I wouldn’t trade it for a second I got to spend with you.
But right now, four days after saying goodbye, it feels like the heartbreak will never heal, like I will never smile again.
Rest in peace, my darling Dozer. I will never forget you, and I will never stop loving you.
Love,
Your mum xoxo
Thank you SASH
To the vets and nurses at the Small Animal Specialist Hospital (SASH),
Thank you for the extraordinary care, skill, and kindness you showed Dozer. Every moment, from the medical expertise to the gentle reassurance and cheering him on, meant more to me than I can say. Knowing he was in such capable, compassionate hands gave me comfort during the hardest days. I will always be deeply grateful for everything you did for my beautiful boy. – Nagi x
Dear Nagi
My heart breaks for you.
Dozer was such a beautiful boy
I feel your pain
The loss of our fur babies is devastating.
I know we never get over it but the love you gave him and the love he gave you was so so special.
Nagi, I came to your website today to look up a recipe, as usual. This post came up. I burst into tears and still can’t stop. Being so emotional took me by surprise. Then I realized that feeling such intense pain over your loss might be because I also used to have a golden retriever who looked so much like Dozer. We had to let him go at the age of 12, when I was pregnant with my son. Funnily enough, my son looks so much like our dog.
I understand your pain, and yes, one day you’ll be able to think of Dozer without tears running down your face. But from my experience, his place in your heart will forever remain empty, “only” filled by your love for him. Years later, when I see a golden on the street, I feel a combination of love, joy, and sadness.
Take care of yourself. Sending hugs and lots of love.
So sorry to hear about Dozer. What a beautiful boy he was. It was beautiful seeing him through your eyes all these years. Look after yourself, it will take some time for you to heal and get through this grief. My deepest sympathy to you during this difficult time. RIP Dozer 🩷🩷
Dear Nagi,
I am so very sorry for your loss of your Best Friend Dozer !
I sit here reading and crying because I lost three of my best friends within a year . My girls lived to be 18 yrs , 16 yrs and 12 yrs old. They were Chichuahuas, my heart will forever be broken !! Dozer is watching over you with love and he is at peace !! Here is a big HUG for you !!
Jan
Sending you the biggest hug beautiful lady and may your memories of all the good times with Dozer calm your heart. Be kind too yourself 💕🫶🏻
I am so sorry Nagi. This was so sad because it was so clear how much you loved him. I understand how hard it is – I lost my beautiful 19yo cat just a week ago (she loved many of your recipes btw). I hope you are getting all the support you need. Thanks so much for sharing this news. Wishing you all the best.
Heartbreaking! Sending love to you all. ❤️
My heart is breaking for you Nagi, my deepest condolence Sis – you and Dozer were like 2 peas in a pod! My husband and I have experienced loss like this a few times and our babies were so precious to us like your Dozer was to you. Sending you strength and love at this time and thank you to you and Dozer for allowing us to witness your pure joy together.
Sobbing so hard. Rest in peace, my beautiful friend. Sending so much love and strength Nagi ❤️🩹
Sobbing while I read this, Nagi. You will smile again and the pain will ease. Your precious Dozer will remain in your heart, forever. Such a good, sweet boy xo
We love you, Dozer and Nagi.
When my Baloo Bear had his last day recently, someone told me that grief is the price we pay for love – my goodness it’s a high price but so worth it for boys as special as Dozer and Baloo.
Much love to you both. 🫂❤️
Oh Nagi, I am so so sorry you have lost the best friend any human could have. They don’t judge us, they just want us to love them and will give everything in return. Dozer gave you 14 wonderful joyous years that will stay in your heart forever. Now, whenever I make a ‘Nagi’ meal ( as they are called in our house) I will always picture Dozer sampling it first. Love to you Nagi, you too have made a lot of people happy xx
i am a doggy mum of my 3rd beautiful golden retriever over my 56 years. They have all been my best friend and I still miss them terribly. Heartfelt sympathy to you Nagi. 🫶🏼🐕
Oh Nagi I’m so sorry 🙁 This just broke my heart into one thousand pieces. RIP Dozer.
Hi Nagi, thank you from the bottom of my heart for your kindness.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I work with dogs for a living and I so enjoyed watching Dozer on all your posts. Your recipes are so reliable and I love them – I am also a home cook who loves to cook and bake, but first and foremost a dog lover. Take good care – it’s tough loving dogs – their live are far too short.
Your heart is broken and there are no words that will help. Please know so many people loved your darling Dozer. He is on the Rainbow Bridge smiling down at you. You were the best mum he could have had.
Oh my goodness, I’m so so sorry to hear about this! Hoping for your healing as you navigate these hard times 🩷
Tears streaming down my face too. That fur soul that chose US…not the other way around. They KNEW u needed eachother for a time….ALL the emotions….hold them close….i will NEVER forget my sam. How lucky we are to have known & been taught such love. the biggest bear hug to you right now